Miss2mrs’s Weblog

I’ve got both hospital bags ready – for Arissa & Mommy. Now, it’s just the waiting time… waiting for Daddy to come home and waiting for the moment when Arissa wants to see the world

I’ve started my weekly check up now. Last week when my mum and I went to see her she was already 2.5kg. We saw her long legs that busy poking my right ribs. Now I know what she’s doing every time I feel pain at that spot… haih, naughty lil girl.. Hehe.. mum and my gynae said she’s running out of space, that’s why I feel the pain there every time she’s trying to move or stretch herself. The best part of my last check up, was seeing that she already got hairs! Looks like lots of them too… tengoklah rambut Mommy & Daddy dia… hehe.. :p Alhamdulillah, she’s really healthy… now I just need to take good care of both of us while waiting for the big day.

I feel fine, except for my wrist. My gynae said I have what it’s called De Quervain’s (not sure if I spelled it right). It’s actually caused by water retention. The water sort of give some pressure to my wrist tendon and that makes me feel really uncomfortable. Especially when I just got up from bed in the morning because when we sleep, our hands are idle right? Memang sakit sangat… it’s hard for me to even brush and tie my hair So I’m currently going through physio therapy besides my weekly check up now.

My hubby is coming back in 2 weeks time. Sekejaaappp je lagi. I can’t wait to see him again. I just hope he’ll still recognize me when I fetch him at the airport. He should! Since I only put on 300g since he’s gone. Huhu… He told me that he didn’t do much shopping there since the currency is so high currently. I don’t mind… after all, we’ve got everything ready for Arissa already. But today when he was out sight seeing, he told me he bought a hand knitted cap and socks for his lil girl. Obviously nothing for mommy yet :p I have the feeling that Arissa is so gonna be daddy’s girl.

I’ve decided to start taking leave by mid of next week. I’ll be in my 38th week anyway. But I’m gonna finish off as much work as I can first then I’m just going to have a good rest and go window shopping with my mum and wait for my hubby to come home

I didn’t really feel the warmth of Eid-ul Adha this year… Maybe because I didn’t get enough sleep the night before, and I felt energy-less when I woke up in the beautiful Eid morning. Thus, I didn’t go for solat raya this morning…

I called my husband and asked him how’s his Eid over there. It was also biasa-biasa for him. He went for solat at the mosque and saw many Malaysians there. But although he tried to befriend them, they sort of just dismissed him. Tak ajak pon pergi rumah makan-makan ke, ape ke… sian my ayang. He ended up going home and have breakfast macam biasa jek. And then in the afternoon he went out with his chinese friends, did some window shopping, and had lunch at Halal Indian restaurant.

So my raya was biasa-biasa je… but thanks to my parents, they did a kenduri doa selamat for me to give birth to this beautiful little girl. Hopefully, with all the doa from the people, everything will go well… insyaAllah…

Yesterday, I had the shock of my life when receiving the news that a very close friend of mine just gave birth. At 23 weeks. I cried thinking what is the fate of the little baby, and the condition of the mother. When I called her phone, her husband answered it and he was crying for it just happened 15 minutes before I called. I guess he was still in shock. According to him, the baby just keluar like that, on the hospital bed. She was already hospitalized because she had bleeding since last Tuesday. When the baby arrived, there were only nurses around, and since the baby is still alive they quickly took the baby to ICU.

Alhamdulillah, my friend has been discharged from the hospital. A swoosh of relief when I hear that because that must be a sign that she’s not experiencing any complication. Her baby girl is a fighter. She’s still surviving and is closely monitored at the hospital. I pray that everything will go well for my friend and her baby… InsyaAllah

Early in the morning today, my big boss called in. Her mood was… fair. But she was OK with me. Then she asked me to call my boss. Yeah, ‘the’ boss I’ve been talking about. All of a sudden, the mood changes from fair to… oh well, stormy-lightning-dark-day. I don’t blame my big boss though. If I were in her shoes, I wouldn’t have much patience left too. Sometimes, I really wish my boss would turn 360 degree. Eh, kalau 360 degree, he’d turn back to his old self. Hmmm… sometimes, I really wish he’d turn 180 degree and for once actually understand what is expected out of him as the boss.

And today, I didn’t manage to keep my coolness. I felt the stress. My tummy pulak keep on stiffening after lunch. I know it’s the Braxton Hicks contractions. I pray hard that it’s not ‘the’ contractions… huhu… But I have to be cool, for Arissa, Hubby, and myself. I want all of us to be together when the day comes…

Just now when my hubby called, I put the phone at my tummy and asked him to speak to Arissa. I don’t know if it’s just coincidence, but she moved! I think she really recognize her daddy’s voice As usual, hubby told her to wait till he get back before she wants to see the world.

These two people means the world to me… they’ll wash away all the stress in no time

I’m getting used to the fact that my hubby is thousands of miles away. With the help of my parents, brothers, and friends, my time are always occupied and thus, I didn’t become a cry baby :p although I miss his presence every second

He’s settling down in Melbourne quite well. He has already moved in to his apartment and started groceries shopping. He called me while he was lining up to pay the groceries…I bet he misses doing groceries with me by his side.. hehe.. One day he called me just to ask how did I always make his Milo. I said 3 teaspoon of Milo and 1 teaspoon of milk since he likes it to taste that way. Sian die… And today, he called so many times, trying to cook curry for his dinner and his friend… tah ape lah jadi agaknye…

Yesterday, my mum accompanied me to my check up. Arissa didn’t wanna show her face to her nanny. She was facing backwards. But she is growing healthily and right on track of a 34 weeks and 5 days baby. Her weight is 2.2kg now. Since I have about 4 to 5 weeks to go, her weight at birth could be around 3.2kg. Quite big I must say…huhu, but she’ll be one cute baby, insyaAllah

My next check up is in 2 weeks time. Which is in my 36 weeks. Thereafter, it’ll be once a week. It’s really starting to feel near to ‘the day’ now…

It was just a brief salam, kisses on each cheek, and he went down the escalator…

I sms him, “No hugs, no i love yous?”

He replied, “Sedih laa… I love you so much….” He didn’t even looked back at me. Just walked on, head down.

I didn’t want to cry either, because I thought it’ll just make me feel worse. So there were no tears when watching him slowly gone from the sight.

He called when he was on the plane and I was on my way home already. We talked, but it sounded really awkward. There were lumps on my throat, but I force myself not to cry. Can. Not. Cry.

When I got home and prayed isya’, that’s when I cried. I miss solat berjemaah with him. I miss hearing him reciting al-Fatihah and doa after prayers. I miss him so much…

Hopefully it’ll be just this one night. No more tears after this.

Ya Allah, please make the 4 weeks go by as fast as possible. I want to see him again…

About 5 weeks to go till my due date… I’m starting to feel like I’m slowing down. Rasa macam my energy is being sucked out bit by bit…huhu.. But alhamdulillah, this little girl is one active baby. She has never made mummy worried bout her because in an hour time, she’ll definitely give some nudges here and there

Work is taking it’s toll on me too. Something happened last Friday, and I think it’s God’s way to help the innocents. Macam biasa, my boss failed to manage or plan his work and macam biasa my big boss would have to remind him on the urgency of the assignment. Macam biasa again, he would try to dump the assignment to me to meet the deadline although, it is crucial to have a discussion with the team in order to do it.

Ntah macam mana, I think I just had enough of this crap. I stormed to the ladies and cried, sambil cuba ambil wuduk to calm down and solat zuhur. Tiba-tiba, this one good friend of mine came in asked me what happened. I told her everything from A – Z in between my sobbing. I told her that he has never been able to manage the work, let alone his staff. I even mentioned that he’s always gone in the morning doing God-knows-what, like on Friday, he was gone from about 9.30 a.m. till 11 a.m. I don’t mind if he’s gone for breakfast, but I really hated it when he came back from wherever he was, he’d acted like he’s just met somebody for discussion with his ‘thinking’ facial expression and papers in hand. Jalan laju-laju macam busy gile.

After I let all my anger out, tibe-tibe, a lady came out from the middle toilet. Guess who it was? It was my big boss. Yep, the boss to my boss. My friend and I just froze when we saw her, but suddenly all 3 of us just broke into laughter. My big boss gave me a rub on the back and said, “I heard everything.” I guess the rub-on-the-back means she understands how I feel… huhu.. Knowing her, I was quite touched with her gesture. Yeah she is garang and serious about work. But at least she’s never made my life miserable. Tu lah kan, I’ve always said to my colleague “rasa macam nak bg tahu big boss jek ape yg die buat selama ni” I guess this time Allah really helped me in letting my big boss knows what he’s done unto us…huhu…

This coming week, I’ll be busy with workshops. I don’t know if my body can take it. I’ll give it a try but promised to myself that if I feel tired, I will listen to my body. I don’t want anything to happen to me and baby while hubby’s thousands of miles away. Yeah, hubby’s leaving already next Tuesday. I won’t have a shoulder to cry on and someone to listen to my crappy work environment for a month

I know he’s just a phone call away. But I’ll definitely miss his presence. First time tau terpisah after kawen…tsk tsk tsk… InsyaAllah Mommy and Arissa going to be fine, 4 weeks will go by fast, and before we know it, Daddy will be with us again

I made my own checklist for my new born preparation based on the references I got from the internet and also friends. I’ve managed to cross out quite a lot in the list already! Yeay! Things that I haven’t bought for the baby are mainly big things like stroller and her bath tub. I haven’t bought her grooming set and toiletries too.

Stroller shopping is quite a headache. With the limited choices we have in Malaysia, I just don’t know which one should I get. Hmm.. sounds cliche, patutnye kalau tak banyak choice, lagi senang lah nak pilih ye tak? haha… My hubby is very keen on the 3-wheelers, which kat Malaysia (or should I say Klang Valley because we haven’t shopped out of this area) ni so far we can only find Quinny and Sweet Cherry strollers. Quinny is soo soo sooo expensive. Whilst Sweet Cherry is soo cheap. I have this thing in my mind that cheap things reflect the performance and durability. Macam shallow thinking jek… but I’ve had few experience with cheap things that proves the not-so-good-quality. My parents said I don’t need to get the stroller that soon since I can always shop for it in Aussie later. Hmmm.. ntahlah. We have about 3 weeks to think about it before Arissa’s Daddy fly off.

Oh, I got my breast pump already! I ordered it online since that’s the best bargain I could get. It’s cheaper RM100 from any other stores and came with free gifts as well!

Here’s the breast pump…

And here’s one of the free gift – a nursing pillow

My husband helped me put the parts together and he tried it on. Yup… to his own t*ts. Haha… he said kene try whether it’s working or not, kalau rosak boleh pulangkan. Hehe… All in all, I’m quite happy with the new device I bought. Seems reliable and can be used for a long term.

I’ve sent most of the baby stuffs to my parents house already. My mum is going to start washing the clothes and other things soon. I think she’s also getting excited to meet her first grand child Oh yeah, i hate driving now. Mainly because it’s so uncomfortable to go through the bad traffic with my big belly and back ache I have to lean back the seat so that my belly won’t be squash in between my hips and chest. But if I leaned too far back, I can’t reach the steering wheel! Most of the time I get a way with it because my dad drives me to work when he’s around.

Dad’s not going to work tomorrow. But he said he’ll send me to the office (Nak jadi mommy pon still di manjakan kan? :p). Our grandfather passed away last night at around 8 p.m. Alhamdulillah dah selesai kebumikan pagi tadi. He died at my aunt’s house. He has been bed ridden for quite some time. I haven’t had the chance to visit him since July I think. When I looked at his jenazah this morning, I saw how thin he was. Rasa kesian sangat… mesti die dah dua tiga bulan tak selera nak makan It’s OK, Allah made it easy for him to go… Semoga rohnya dicucuri rahmat, Al-Fatihah.

Can you believe it?? Dulu-dulu masa baru start counting the weeks, I always felt like the time goes by so slow… rasa macam lambat sangat nak lepas the 1st trimester. But once I was in the 2nd trimester, I felt like the time started to fly so fast. And now, I’m 30 weeks pregnant! Only +/- 10 weeks to go!!

How I’m feeling right now?? Excited, nervous, worried…

I’m so excited to meet my baby – the little girl who’s really active in my tummy. I can feel her growing and growing in here. I think she’s really clever and talkative too… when she’s awake, I’d talk to her, and I always felt like she understands and responding to me with her little fist or sometimes hard kick. When I’m sad, I felt like she’s caressing me from the inside. She likes her daddy very much too… she’d show off her wave movement when daddy’s talking to her. When I’m merajuk with her daddy, she would too by not responding to daddy’s touch. Hehe…

I’m also nervous and worried. Not so much about the labor because I don’t want to think about the pain and what not. I want to feel it when it comes. But I’m nervous and worried about my husband’s presence when I’m about to give birth He’s leaving for overseas assignment in less than a month time and I couldn’t follow him yet because the HR couldn’t prepare the documentation/package to take family soon enough before November 16th (the day hubby had to start work there). As a result, he’s going first because I can’t give birth in Australia since it’s not covered in the insurance. But he promised to come back 10 days before our baby’s due date. Now, I constantly pujuk my little girl not to come out too early… please wait for daddy, nanti siapa nak azan kan untuk Arissa… I hope she’ll be a good girl and wait for her daddy After I finish my confinement, and baby pon dah kuat sikit, we’ll be joining daddy there, insyaAllah…

I know my husband is also worried and sad that he couldn’t be there for me during my peak time. So now, dia yang beria ajak prepare for baby’s stuff as much as possible before he leaves for Aussie. I have my parents to take care of me and they can always take me for baby shopping. But I know he doesn’t want to be left out from the baby preparation.

I’m still taking unpaid leave before my due date because I can imagine what it’s like if I were to keep working until ‘the’ day. When you have a boss who depends on you too much, you just have to make this decision. I know he wouldn’t change, because he’s just plain thick skin and dumb. I’ve come to several instances when I was really sick (even when I was on a hospital bed in ER!) and he just doesn’t have the empathy and still bother me with SMS and calls to ask about work. Most of the things are just plain tasks that he couldn’t think about it himself. Even if it’s a complicated task, he should be able to think about it more than I do! After all he’s the boss and he’s so much older than me. Takkan tak boleh pikir sendiri kan… Haih, so can you imagine what it’s like to be in my shoes? Bak kata Nabil, Lu pikir lah sendiri! huhu…

So, my unpaid leave will be effective from 30th November and my last day at work will be 13th November since I still have 9 days of Annual Leave left. My husband is leaving on the 15th November, so it’s the right timing. I’ll be staying at my parents’ house, counting the days to meet my husband again, and for the BIG day!

Hope it’s not too late to wish Selamat Hari Raya to all my dear friends! Maaf zahir dan batin ye, jika ada terlanjur kata time bergura-gurau tu…

In the past 2 months, bukan tak terpikir nak update… actually banyak gile cerita that I want to share. It’s just that either I didn’t have the time or I’m not in the mood to put what I feel in words. Anyway, I’ll try to summarize as much story as possible in this entry…

1. Ramadhan
Alhamdulillah, puasa has been quite easy for me and baby. Tapi terpaksa jugak buang 2 hari sebab muntah-muntah and buang air yang agak severe. Kalau ikutkan hati memang nak teruskan puasa aje, but now I have this lil baby Melur to think about. Hubby convinced me to berbuka juga… so I did. Seronoknye dapat ganti 2 hari je tahun ni

During puasa months too, tibe-tibe jadi gian sangat nak memasak, altough balik kerja dah rasa letih sangat-sangat. Even my hubby tengok pon rasa kesian, but I felt lost if I didn’t cook something :p Usually during weekends I cooked something special; we had pizza, shepherd pie, soto, Mexican dish, Nasi goreng tomato special (resepi Aunty Noni), etc. Everytime lepas masak rasa puas sangat… hehe

2. Raya
This year is my second raya as a wife and my turn to have the 1st days of Raya with my family. We went back to JB on raya eve and the road was superbly clear! Bertolak pukul 6.30 a.m. sampai rumah Tok Mak pukul 9 a.m. terus ajar my hubby to anyam ketupat. Hehe… Seronok dapat share our big family rituals with my husband. Masak ketupat sendiri, buat satay sendiri, the boys and their activies (futsal lah.. bowling lah..) It was really fun Dapat lah rasa rendang and serunding Tok Mak yang fresh tahun ni. Tahun lepas, raya ke-4 baru dapat mkn…huhu.. But by the 2nd raya morning, I don’t feel like eating all the spicy food anymore. Terus ajak Hubby pergi Mesra shop to get bread and peanut butter and fresh milk…

3. Baby
I’m entring the 3rd or final trimester dah! Alhamdulillah!! Baby melur, is definitely a Melur! We found out her gender during my check up in Ramadhan. She’s definitely a shy and very feminine baby…hehe.. Sebab every time check up nak tengok muka die, mesti die cover2 her face with her lil cute fist. And her legs mesti crossed. We finally get to see her face in my recent check up last Thursday. My gynae said she got my nose and her daddy’s mouth. Balik rumah, bile belek2 the 3D scanned picture, baru perasan her cheekbone… high, and macam tembam jek… hehe. At almost 7 months pregnant, I can definitely feel the change in my body. I’m starting to feel the weight of the baby (even though she’s just 1kg now, ape lah mummy ni.. lembik betul :p), and my back dah start sakit betul2. Usually it took me half an-hour before I could settle down to sleep at night. Tossing and turning around nak cari the best spot to sleep. Kadang-kadang Melur is on my right, so if I lie on my right, I’d get a kick from her… “Mummy! You’re squashing me!!” terpaksa lah mummy beralah… But there’s nothing compared to her kicks and punches. Every time she does that, a swoosh of happiness will make me crack a smile and assured me that she’s a really healthy baby, Alhamdulillah. And of course, skarang ramai dah tanye… “dah ade nama ke for baby?” Yes, we’ve a name for her… we even call her by that name now

4. Work
Now, how shall I put this in words… work doesn’t sucks. I don’t hate my job, but I don’t like it as much as I like baking either…huhu… The only problem I’m facing now (and the rest of team member) is my immediate boss. Rasa malas nak cerita pasal die, sebab kalau cerita memang sampai esok tak abis. Tapi nak jugak cerita sebab he’s the most annoying person I’ve ever met. The funniest part is, orang yang tak kerja dengan die pon dapat tempias aura annoying tu. Even if you don’t know him in person, you can just tell that he’s not honest. Why I say this is that, dia selalu kantoi with our big boss on the deadlines of work and every time kene kantoi, die ada alasan. The most annoying part is that, bile die kene marah dengan big boss die either senyap or cakap he didn’t get the assignment from us until last minute. Padahal, we are always aware of the deadline and always give him 1 week earlier for him to review our work! And then lepas kene marah, he’d turn to us and say, “I bukan ape, bile kene marah… I tanak lah blame you guys for not doing the work” WTH??? Everyday, he will annoy me without fail. Gelabah at things that he shouldn’t like if I’ve printed this n that for a meeting… when he should be gelabah if I didn’t do the actual proposal itself. Faham tak? Die gelabah on basic things jek, like projector dah ready ke… bilik meeting dah ade ke… not on the core job itself. Nasib baik I don’t have to wait for his idea or directions to get the work done. Kalau tunggu, memang tak siap keje. He’s lucky because we always save his ass. We never waited to be told what to do, because we are independent enough to get the work done even without him. I wonder how on earth die boleh jadi manager. I wish I can ask for a portion of his salary. Dah, malas nak cerita pasal die… he’ll only spoil my weekend. I need to remind myself constantly that it’s not worth it to stress myself because of him.

Anyway, today we’re having some friends over to the house for makan-makan Raya. I’ll be cooking Nasi Lemak and Spaghetti for them…and my hubby dah order Satay too Have a nice weekend!

Dah setahun dah?? Gosh, time really flies… Alhamdulillah, we reached our 1st year wedding anniversary, yesterday! 16th August, 2009.

The weekend was full with family commitment so we didn’t really get to ‘go away’ on our own. But we vow that, no matter what, we’d spend the time together. So in between the family thingy, we managed to find time on Saturday for a trip to the spa~ We both had facials and enjoyed our time there. It was very relaxing and rejuvenating

That Saturday evening, we received the best 1st year anniversary gift one can get: A kick from the ‘lil one I definitely felt it strong, but I wasn’t sure if hubby could feel it from the outside. I called him to try and touch my belly nonetheless. And then, there she was! Dush! Kicking/punching Daddy’s hand for the first time! It was definitely a moment we’ll never forget…

Hubby had already booked a dinner for two at Revolving Restaurant KL Tower on Sunday night to celebrate our 1 year Anniversary. So after my SIL kenduri, we went to KL for the dinner. Thank goodness it wasn’t raining that night, so the KL lights was visible for us to enjoy the view. The food was so-so, but it’s not that bad either. What’s important is that we were together, celebrating the 1st milestone of our marriage, with a baby coming in 4 months time. I’m also proud to have parents like my mum and dad. They’re the only one who remembered our happiest day, and wished us Happy Anniversary…it was just a simple wish, but I was really happy that they remembered

Alhamdulillah, although a lot of tests from Him was put unto us, we managed to stick by each other through thick and thin. In marriage, what’s important is that you are willing to give and take, try to understand each other better, and sabar menghadapi dugaanNya.

I’m thankful to Allah for this blissful family, and hope He’ll continue to guide us to His path… Amiin~